Growing pains....

I've recently had to face a new parenting hurdle. Am I keeping up with my kids and their needs or I am trying to keep them young and innocent and unexposed? Professionally, I spend a great deal of time advising parents on how to "grow with their kids", how to give them some leeway, the ways in which doing so can improve their relationship with their kids. The difference is that we're usually discussing teenagers. So, you can imagine that I was a bit taken back when I realized I needed to do that with Kayleigh a bit. I realized this around a somewhat unexpected issue - TV shows. Kayleigh came home at the end of the school year and said that her friend had told her that she "watched baby shows". While my kids watch more TV than I'd like, we are proud of the fact that they have watched strictly educational programming - Sesame Street, Dora the Explorer, other shows on "Noggin" which promote skill and character development. I have fought against Hannah Montana, Suite Life, SpongeBob, Power Rangers, etc - NOT in my house. It didn't take too long to learn that no matter how "hard I parent", their peers are more powerful than I am. They still know every character and every storyline of shows they never watch in our house. So, here is the dilemma....
Kayleigh is now at the point where she can't contribute directly to these conversations about these shows and it is really starting to impact her self-concept. This really surprised me. I didn't anticipate her feeling "left out" over a TV show. I didn't anticipate her being picked on for what she watched on TV. For the first month or so, I said, "well, you're not watching those shows. They are not for 7 year olds." It then ocurred to me that I had never really watched the shows, I just couldn't picture my little girl watching them. I started to try to put myself in her shoes. Don't I often try to watch the popular shows or the season finales of things so that I won't be left out at the watercooler the next day? Same principle.
So, where I landed was that perhaps I needed to spend some time researching these shows and to adapt a bit to my daughter's changing needs. Even though these shows seem "old" for her, maybe it is me who needs to look at whether their storylines are more appropriate for her age - conflict resolution, peer interaction, etc. I remain steadfast on the "no bad language, no shows where characters bully or are mean, and no violence (hooray no power rangers!). Interestingly, she still wants the old shows too - she just wants to add a few to her repetoire. Seems fair.
So, this is me...loosening up and trying to see my daughter's point of view. I guess I didn't really expect to have to face this for a few years...I'll keep you posted on the evolution in our household as I long for the days Elmo and Big Bird!
Much love.